Well, it is about time I got around to talking a bit more about my own company.  Today was a special day for my airline, Canadian North and for the Canadian Football League.  Never before has either organization celebrated their unique brands as they both did today.  

Today we unveiled our first "logo-jet", branded with the official logo of all 9 CFL franchise teams.  Over a hundred spectators representing employees of both organizations, plus many members of the media were present as we literally dropped the curtain unveiling the spectacular homage to Canadian Football. 

My role was to represent the Flight Attendant group, myself and 9 other colleagues all donned our uniforms in order to be brand ambassadors.  I don't get to wear my uniform very often, my usual day to day life revolves around the office and of course the classroom.  

However, today was a great reminder of why it is that I do what I love.  Of the many hats that I wear, deep down, everything I do is because I am a Flight Attendant.  Watching my colleagues celebrate a great day and moment for our company was an amazing culture booster.  The pride was visible on the faces of each and every employee. 

We are not the biggest airline in the country, and we often hear "who are you guys again?" or "where do you fly to?".  To know that because of the industry leading service we provide, and the impeccable standards each employee sets for themselves we are able to secure national contracts such as this one. A contract that will take our people, and our beautiful airplanes to even more corners of the country.

I am proud to represent Canadian North, and to be counted among the hardest working and most dedicated aviation professionals one could ever dream of.  

With flying pride,

Jeff

Check out the TSN coverage from today, watch how we painted the aircraft and then dropped the curtain for all to see. 

http://www.tsn.ca/video/cfl-canadian-north-unveil-custom-painted-plane-1.138618

I have had the pleasure throughout my career to be an invited guest speaker at several conferences on Cabin Safety.  I have spoke at the International Cabin Safety Conference in Amsterdam, Vancouver and was invited to Zurich before the conference was abruptly cancelled due to insolvency on the part of the conference organizer. 

I enjoyed being able to speak and found it to be a rewarding experience.  Over the past two years I have had several colleagues tell me that I should get back into a speaking circuit organized by another event provider.  I would love to! the problem I am having is that I don't know what topic I should write a paper on and one that I can catch the attention of the organizer with an abstract of 200 words or less... 

I am going to go for it, but I need your help!  I have until the end of the month to submit a 200 word abstract in order to be considered for a speaking spot. I have created a poll of topics that I am considering.  The conference organizer is looking for topics that cover "Target Training Interventions and Aviation Safety".  Additionally if you think there is a different topic not listed in my poll, please leave a comment. 

Speak well, 

Jeff 

It did not take very long to receive curious questions about my recent post.  There appears to be a strong desire to share what I have learned about feedback and what my recommended best practices are.  Without question, I am happy to share them.

I believe that there are two essential beliefs we must have in order to have open and honest feedback conversations:

1. Keep them simple 
2. Keep them authentic

After my beliefs I follow these rules:

1. Be Nice - Remember what our parents told us? "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all".  Feedback IS a good and nice thing so long as your purpose is to share.  If your purpose to is crush someones soul and to hurt them, then don't open your mouth.  Also, take ownership for your emotional wake.  What you tell someone, even when it is delivered in the best package possible might still startle them, even hurt or embarrass them.  So deliver the message simply, do not drop it on them like a bomb. 
2. Be Honest - Do not stretch your truth because you want them to "really get it".  If they for a moment think that what your saying is made up or manipulative then you're sunk... they have stopped listening.  Also, where is your finger print on the issue?  If you do own all or a part of the issue or anything that contributed to it you need to own that "I am sorry that I have not had this conversation sooner, by avoiding it I only added to your confusion over ____" or "I have to apologize for ___ I can see that by doing ___, I made this worse for you".
3. Don't Give Advice - This is very hard for a lot of people, because most us like to stand on a soapbox and show how experienced we are.  Un-fortunately this won't help the person you are sharing your feedback with.  They will start to feel that you are showing that you are proving to them how good you are at what they apparently fail at.  They need to own their own path and course correction.  If they ask you "What should I do?" ask them "what do you think you should do?".
4. Say "Thank You"  - Providing feedback is one thing, receiving it can be a whole other story.  When your conversation is over, genuinely thank them for listening and taking in your feedback.  Let them know if they have any questions or if anything needs further discussion to let you know. 

I also have a list of practices to avoid.  In fact, never ever do any of the following.  If you are unclear why, go back to my statement about honesty. 

1. NO sandwich feedback -  Many people were taught a number of years ago that to provide feedback you should always start and end with something positive.... What if you don't actually have anything positive to say about the poor soul you are about to lie to...?  It end's up sounding like this "Susan, I adore you and how hard you work here.  But, if you are ever late like that again I will make you available to industry.  Oh! and I love your shoes!".  The Learning and Human Resource industries all agree now that sandwich feedback is not the way to go anymore.  In fact, we refer to the feedback sandwich as the "S#$T Sandwich", think about it... Who would ever want to eat a S#$T Sandwich.
2. Do not interrupt them - When they are talking and sharing their thoughts, emotions or perspectives do not cave to your inner defence mechanism, be present in the conversation.  Have this conversation as if nothing else in the world exists.  The same goes for multi tasking.  It is beyond rude to be dealing with e-mails, texting, etc.  When you do this, it tells the world that you don't really care and that this conversation really is not that important to you. 
3. "We agree to disagree" - I hear this every so often and it is worse than nails on a chalkboard for me.  If you seem to not be making any headway in the conversation just take a time-out.  Say something like "I feel this conversation has hit a road block and this is very important to me, lets take a break, sleep on it and continue our conversation tomorrow".  Sleep is magical, it is amazing what happens after resting and reflecting on something.  I guarantee that both of you will come back into the conversation with a different perspective.  If the other person says the above, say "we can't agree because I don't think we understand each others perspective".  At the end of the day, either person may not agree with everything said, however there is always a little nugget of something that each person can take away with them. 
4. Anonymous/E-mail/Text - Anonymous feedback is an evil thing invented to allow people to hide behind a wall and lob a weapon of mass emotional destruction.  The one caveat I have for this is as it pertains to safety.  Anonymous feedback that is safety related allows people to identify hazards without fear of reprisal and we have to support this.  Many workplaces will allow anonymous feedback and it is killing the passion and creativity in people.  Anonymous means nameless and faceless, how is that in line with belief number 2 above?  At the very least, allow people, and yourself the license to dismiss anonymous feedback especially in cases where they don't understand it and would require clarification or perhaps specific examples in order to make a course correction.  When it comes to feedback, if you can't put your name on it then it is most likely not something worth sharing (again, go back to the belief on being nice).  E-mail and text feedback? need I say more?  Feedback is a conversation, a loop of back and fourth sharing.  Body language and tone account for 55% and 38% of understood conversation, you lose that in written form and wild misunderstandings are certain to happen. 

What practices to avoid have your name on them?  What can you work on?  It is my absolute certain belief that the relationships both personal and professional are the sum of the quality and truth in the conversations we are having.  What relationships can you improve?  What should you be saying and sharing that you are not right now?and how much is that costing you?

Converse well,

Jeff

The other day I received a phone call from a member of my team.  This person reports to me and is a front line leader based at another location than where I am.  She has worked with our company for about 8 months and comes with over 20 years of industry experience.  I really enjoy her and wish that we didn't have geography between us, due to these distance obstacles she tends to liaise more with my leader, which is perfectly fine.  Back to the phone call, she said "I was hoping to chat with you about something...", "ok, I am all ears" I said.  She shared with me that she felt I had not been a fan of her and perhaps that I didn't feel that she was capable of doing her job to my satisfaction, she finished with her sentiment that she had really enjoyed working with me this past week and that she thought I was very good at what I do.  Gulp... When she finished telling me how she felt, I offered my apology and told her that I did feel she was very much capable of doing her job and a valued member of the team.  I continued with my thanks to her, I told her she was courageous and I was very grateful she was able to speak so candidly with me.

Now, were her feelings correct? It doesn't matter, that is how she felt and I own that.  Did I love hearing that I had caused someone to feel that way? absolutely not, but this valued employee had essentially saved our working relationship.  How much damage could have been done if she continued on feeling that way?  I am guessing down the road a shocking and sudden "blow up" would have occurred that would have left both of our heads spinning, or worse.  

The fact is, I needed to hear that.  Now, I am aware and armed with the knowledge that I have to be better.  I need to ensure that I meet her needs or support, openness and communication.  After I told her how grateful and proud I was of her for speaking up I told her that I expect to hear if I am ever causing her to feel that way again and that I would also be checking in on her to see how we were doing with our communication. 

What is the first thing you think of when someone says, "we need to talk", "can we have a moment?", "I have some feedback for you...".  Are you suddenly gripped with gut turning fear?  Perhaps not, but I am certain you are like most people and you are at the very least thinking "ok.... here we go".

So, why does this happen? why are we so afraid of feedback?  Some common reasons that I have come to realize are all based on fear, fear of an emotional reaction, fear of the unknown, fear of feeling picked on.  I think that as a society our environment has brought us to an apex of emotion.  We don't want to hear what we are not doing well, but we demand to hear what we are doing right.

I hear often, "these millennials" or "what is with the entitlement these days".  I often ask, "what would you say to the person(s) that make you feel this way if it were easy and you could just say what you felt?".  I actually get some great responses and feedback and it makes me wonder, "what would your life be like if you just said what you were thinking?".  

As my story above shares, it is the conversations we have, or do not have that define the relationships in our lives.  How long have you lived in turmoil not saying the thing that you desperately wanted to say, what was the cost of that relationship?

Be brave, have the conversation, say what is bothering you.  I promise that your relationships will be more authentic and far less stressful.  If you are on the listening side of this conversation.  Do just that, shut out your own inner voice and listen, and I mean actually listen.  No interruptions or cutting off, just listen. 

Until next time, 

Jeff